A good nanny is an excellent relief.
Having someone who knows her place in the home, respects boundaries and yet is able to genuinely love my children has made my life so much easier. God has blessed me so much and when I count my blessings, I count Uju.
Initially I was skeptical about letting a stranger come into my home but I needed the help as Nduka and I are orphans. I had just had Samuel by a caesarean section… I just couldn’t cope.
I remembered vividly the day Uju walked into my home. She was nineteen, skinny, breastless and very shy. She looked very feeble and I thought she would be unable to keep up with the house chores but I was wrong. She quickly learnt what I expected her to do and she maintained a good attitude. Uju knew how to integrate fun into her daily chores… I adored her and she fitted perfectly into my home. Everyone thought we were blood relatives and I didn’t try to correct that impression. She was the baby sister I didn’t have.
Three years went by and I had two more sons. Three energetic boys and Uju was still standing but I knew she needed a break and so I employed a maid; Sandra. After Sandra was employed. Nduka and I agreed to send Uju to a prestigious school of catering and like I expected, she did exceptionally well… We encouraged her further by getting a job for her in order to fine tune her craft. I was excited that she was on her way to a promising future.
Everything was perfect until Nduka suddenly started insisting that we relocate to Europe. His friends had secured a job for him and he didn’t want to miss out on the opportunity. I didn’t have a problem with relocating but the only problem was Uju. Nduka insisted that we leave her behind. “ Nduka, this girl has become family” I kept saying but he put his feet down and we left without Uju.
Before we left, Nduka gave me some money to rent an apartment for Uju and Open a small confectionary shop. Uju wasn’t excited and I understood her sentiments. She had given us six years of her life and now that we have the opportunity to bless her, Nduka has decided to harden his heart. It was unfair!!
We arrived in Ireland and settled in just fine. I missed Uju so much and tried to reach her to no avail; she wasn’t picking her calls or replying to her messages. I knew something was wrong. I asked a friend; julie to find out what was going on. I was told that Uju was living with a “husband” and was pregnant.
Her withdrawal made sense to me now. Uju had promised to be celibate until marriage. She knew how disappointed I would be but I loved her too much to let this mistake spoil our relationship. I sent yet another text and she finally responded.
She was so sorry for not answering my calls or responding to my messages but most of all, She was sorry for disappointing me with the pregnancy and living with a man that had not married her. I told her it was ok and the weeks that followed were like old times.
5th of March, 2015 and her son finally arrived. I wanted to see pictures but unfortunately Uju’s phone had a fault.. I went on a shopping spree with the money Nduka gave me. I even bought a new Phone. I had to see my grandson. The kids were excited hat they had a “baby brother” and wanted pictures too. I quickly packed the boxes and shipped it to Nigeria.
After six long weeks, I finally got a picture of my grandson. He was so cute! I used his picture as my display picture (proud grandma) I celebrated his milestones even more than his own mother but my happy days ended on the 19th of April 2016 when Nduka fell off a badly constructed scarfold at work.
My best friend, confident, first and only love left me alone. We agreed that death would take us together … Nduka!!!
The days that followed were dark. I had to deal with in-laws and customs (that is a story for another day) and when all was said and done, the children, Nduka and I went back to Nigeria.
It was different because Nduka didn’t sit by us. I knew he was on board our flight but like a luggage, he had been tucked away somewhere…
As a family, we mourned him so deeply. Uju didn’t leave my sight. She cut her hair as well…I knew that Nduka would be honoured.
I stayed back after the funeral to sort out a few things.
I asked Uju to bring Junior to spend some time with me but she just didn’t. Nduka’s death hit her as hard as it did me.
The day before my departure, I decided to visit. She looked devastated … I wanted to see junior but was told a neighbor had taken him out. We chatted for about an hour and I had the opportunity to meet her “husband” . When it was time to leave, She escorted me to the waiting taxi and while we stood to say our good byes, I heard “Nduka!” Instinctively, I turned around and saw a fair little boy running towards us.
He looked exactly like my sons. This wasn’t the same baby on my social network profiles…
He looks like my sons and his name is Nduka…
“ whose son is this?” I asked but she was quiet.
I asked her over and over again until I found myself screaming.
She was still quiet but she had fallen on her knees with her hands on her head …
“ Mummy I’m sorry” she whispered.
It still didn’t make sense.
“ so whose pictures have you been sending to me?”
She began to cry profusely,
“Mummy he looked exactly like Samuel, Emma and Ben, I knew you would figure it out?”
That was the last thing I heard or remembered. I woke up with unending flashbacks … things that meant nothing now had a lot of meaning. this is so hard!
I always knew that the heart of man is desperately wicked but knowing it is so different from experiencing it….
*…Blog picture [two sides] gotten from https://www.pinterest.com/pin/331085010082567826/ through google search.